Zoe Martinez

[bumblebee]

Character

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Name: Zoe Martinez

Age: 13

Gender: female

Appearance: Zoe has blonde hair and green eyes. she never wears long sleeves or jackets and she always has her shoulder bag around her. Zoe wears sailor shirts and mini skirts because she thinks they are cute and atractive. Zoe always has her hair in pigtails that go down to her waste because she hates her hair in her face.


Personality: Zoe is shy around new people but not afraid to compete with pokemon cuteness. She is nice to people even if she does not know them. Zoe is very quiet but she is also intergetic.

History: Zoe's parents died when she was 2 years old so her grandparents brought Zoe and her brother Todd to there ranch were they would be raised. When Zoe was 5 she read about pokemon and learned about the pokemon compitions. Zoe studied with her grandmothers books for 8 years then she came to her grandparents and said "I want to be a coordinater."

Zoe's grandfather wanted her to be a trainer. Her grandmother said she wanted Zoe to be a ranger. Zoe got so mad that the next morning she packed her bags and left. When Zoe left she found a egg on the side of the road. Zoe raised the egg and soon she had a Eevee. Zoe and her Eevee became best freinds as they made there way to Zoe's aunts house in pine village.

Career: Zoe is a coordinater.

The Daemon

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Name: Copper

Form (If settled): Eevee

Appearance: Normal Eevee with hazel eyes and he is extra fluffy.


Personality: Copper is shy of new people but does not act affraid. He likes it when he gets to ride in the shoulder bag because Copper does not like loud sounds.

[Angel]

You need at least 2 paragraphs for History.

[Birdybot]

Plus you spelt Eevee wrong ^-^

[bumblebee]

fixed

[Angel]

Right, sorry but the image you have used for your appearance has now bene moved/deleted by photobucket - therefore in order for you to get accepted or rated you need to either delete the picture or find a new one.

Sorry that we're picking holes and everything but rules are there for a reason ^_^

[Birdybot]

Plus you need a proper paragraph for your appearance and personality, more than just a couple of sentences!

[Angel]

Also some of your sentences are incorrect grammar, for example: That makes her attractive. This sentence by itself doesn not make sense, it needs to be connected to the previous sentence in order for it to be understandable and grammatically correct, probably with a - .

[bumblebee]

ok i will fix it im sorry im not real good at grammer.

[bumblebee]

im done with the profile thing that is the last time im fixing it.

[Birdybot]

I can give you a Very Common rating, since this still isn't detailed and is covered with spelling and grammar errors. You seem to be forgetting the first few lessons you ever get at school; names, including I, I've, I'm, etc, all have a capital letter at the beginning, and that you need to have a capital letter at the start of every sentence. Another tip; I'd recomend you use the spell check for your posts, there's a spell check button at the bottom of the post messagy thing.

Have fun in Enera! Feel free to edit your profile for a better rating, or post a thread in Pine's Lab (remember that in the lab the door's locked so you'll have to knock).

[bumblebee]

Im not forgetting the lessons! Im just not good at grammer

[Angel]

I can help you if you want bumble, I really don't mind and it'll be good for you because you can take the skills into real life if you want. Just PM me if you need anything and I'll be willing to help

[Birdybot]

Plus, if you made a new thread in the board I told you about; pokemoncompass.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=rpractice

That would help. Basically, just post saying the thing you'd like to roleplay, then we'd roleplay it and help you improve grammar, spelling, and general descriptive skills.